Friday, May 25, 2012

It rained today.


Great video for a gloomy, rainy, friday. I am not a sponsor for method products and i don't have any cool giveaways to go along with this (like other bloggers would do) but the mere fact that it made me laugh today has me posting it here. Cause that was hard to do today. 



Wednesday, May 23, 2012

A Word On Cars.

Apparently, when it comes to operating large machinery, I can't be trusted. I got in what the insurance agency calls a ''Fender-Bender'' last friday. Perfect way to start the weekend…right? Now, before you go pointing fingers and whispering let me relay how it happened. Because the first thing John asked me (after making sure I and the baby weren't physically hurt of course) was ''You PROMISE you weren't looking at your phone??!" YES! I PROMISE. I was driving downtown minding my own business when suddenly the light ahead of me turned yellow. The van in front of me probably had color-blindness issues because he SLAMMED on his breaks like it was glaringly red. I proooobbbbabbly was following a tad too close because I didn't have enough time to fully stop before I hit him. But who slams their breaks at a fresh yellow light?! 

Luckily no one was hurt. He was a nice guy and didn't call the cops so I didn't get a ticket. (That may have been because he and his drop-dead-gorgeous wife were all dressed up and heading somewhere fancy that they were in a hurry for…but i'm gonna pretend it's cause he decided to have pity on me.) 

Did I mention I was driving our lovely forest green 1995 Geo Prism and he was driving a MERCEDES? And that lovely Mercedes bumper is gonna cost more than our entire car cost us? *sigh* 

Crazy enough, John and I have a friend who performs miracles with cars and was able to get ours in the shop and fixed up in no time. We decided since there was no engine damage to just bend our hood back in place and replace the light. Thus, causing our already ghetto car to look more ghetto with a new large dent and white scratch. Ah well, what do you do. ALSO, just to note: you know you have a crapy car when the auto body shop guy makes fun of you for it. That made for a great monday morning. How do you come back from that? Answer: You DON'T. You accept it, chuckle politely while dragging out a ''yeaahhhhh'' and change the subject. 

And onn that subject…I'm PRETTY SURE that I get judged every time I drive on the freeway. It was an amazing new concept when we got our Geo Baby this winter. People TREAT me like I have an old car. Speed up waaaay fast, ride my butt for two seconds and then zip into the other lane while not making eye contact with me as if I don't exist. ''SIR! I was going 78mph! And you my friend are driving a PRIUS. How are you judging me?!" I may look old and decrepit in this Geo Prism but it's got guts ok?! I have never felt stereotyped in my whole life until we bought this car. Maybe that's healthy for me to feel what the minority feels like. I do however feel part of some group now. Like, how, while dating an ex boyfriend, I learned that motorcyclists have a language. While passing they stick out their hand and do a thumb and pointer finger salute. Apparently you're cool if you know this. Well, now i'm part of the ''Yes, this baby is still running'' group. Every time I pass someone in a car relatively like mine we do the half-grin-nod. Yeaaaaahhhh I got you. Word. And then I turn up my music REALLL loud to compensate. Can we call this ''Old Car Syndrome'' as well? Probably. Somewhat similar to ''Little Man Syndrome". 

Maybe we shouldn't' get me started on syndromes….

Here's a pic of our car instead. Happy driving. 


Monday, May 21, 2012

Sugar and Spice...

...and everything nice! WE'RE HAVING A GIRL! 



I really am trying to keep my ''I'M AWESOME CAUSE I'M PREGNANT'' posts to a minimum but I couldn't resist this one. Especially since we actually have news so there you go. We are so excited! I am sure some of you are remembering when I mentioned that John wanted a boy and I wanted a girl...let me first just say (ahem) point for Sarah...and secondly, it did take John a fraction of a second to mourn that it wasn't a boy but he is way excited now too and keeps asking me ''How are my girls today?"which is cute in the 'no-one-else-but-me-thinks-so' kind of way. 

Now, for those of you that know John, you know that he is the type of person that walks into a room and immediately has a million friends and people laughing and having a good time. So, at the doctors office the nurses are putty in his hands. It was like a production unveiling what we are having after we came out of the ultrasound room. To which was followed by a million squeals and giggles and congratulations. It's like people roll out the red carpet for him! I'm just pull the awkward smile and nod behind him as they bat their eyelashes at him and look at me like ''You don't know how lucky you are." Which, I'm sure I don't. This tactic works on waitresses just fabulously as well. I swear to you John's drink is never empty and we usually end up getting some kind of discount or free dipping sauce. Once we were lucky enough to get a SMILEY face on the receipt. Inappropriate you say? Nah. It's my husband and it works on guys as well as girls. (DON'T you dare take that the wrong way.) People just LIKE him. What can I say? When it brings us perks I can't really complain. Anyway...tangent sorry. 

We went to my sister's dance recital on Saturday and during the 2 hour poor John leans over to me and whispers, "This is going to be the story of my life for the next 18 years isn't it" Yes my dear. It is. HOORAY FOR LITTLE GIRLS!

Friday, May 18, 2012

Snow Cones and Short Shorts



Why is it that snow cone huts are continually surrounded by 15-19 year olds with perfect bodies, tan skin and short shorts? 

And WHY oh WHY have I been burdened with craving snow cones durning this blissful pregnancy? I think that surrounding myself with tan little nymphs is probably NOT the best thing for this moody, pregnant, hormonal state I'm in. *sigh*

NEVERTHELESS....

I begged John into going with me last night but, ''Sarah! There was a game on!'' so, my cute Father-in-law offered to come with me. We got there and found ourselves behind a large line of the tan breed. This included a batch of tan boys who had rather large egos. The snow cone chick handed out a snow cone to my Father-in-law after about 10 min of waiting and told him she was sorry for the wait and thanks for coming. At about this time he had taken a large lick/suck off the top of his blended snow cone. (Not with a spoon mind you, with his lips and tongue) Not more than 10 seconds later, she and he realized that, in fact, that was NOT his snow cone but one of the kids in front of us. 

Panic ensued and my Father-in-Law had the greatest idea. He got out a spoon, scooped out the top where he had licked and told the girl... 

''Hurry! Just tuck back in there, pretend you're still making it and then call out the flavor again real loud. Don't make a new one''

She being 16, tan and booty-licious herself giggled then did exactly as she was told. (wow.) The guy who's snow cone it ACTUALLY was, was one of these egotistical hormones raging type. He walked up like some hot shot, grabbed his snow cone and went back to flirting. 

At about this point my Father-in-law and I got the giggles, grabbed our snow cones and headed back to the car. We laughed our butts off the WHOLE way home. Just picture that snotty high school kid going to town on his snow cone that had been previously licked by a 60 year old man with great hair. 

JUSTICE I TELL YOU! Pure justice. Who cares if I'm fat and white, you just ate someone else's saliva!


Tuesday, May 15, 2012

Kitchen Kitchen Where Have You Been?

In celebration of our new kitchen finally being functional I made dinner last night. (Note: functional does not mean completely put together looking awesome. Functional means we plugged in the microwave and oven and cleared off an inch of counter space.) And since I was pretty proud of myself, I took pictures to prove it. While John chuckled of course. 


BBQ Chicken Salad Extraordinare!


I do this thing where I buy rotisserie chickens and pick the chicken off and shred it. I don't love boiling chicken and trying to dispose of the greasy water so this works fabulous for me. Plus, for around $7, it provides two meals worth of shredded chicken!









John was so proud. I took some to work the next day for lunch and got made fun of for putting BBQ sauce on a salad. Who hasn't had a BBQ chicken salad?!?! Weirdo.

Friday, May 4, 2012

Just Because.



Have a good weekend everyone!

Thursday, May 3, 2012

My New Favorite Thing.

I think that my new favorite thing about being pregnant is when people at work comment on my eating choices. Take yesterday for example. I happened to be making some Ramen Noodles in the break room and a coworker came in and POINTED at my bowl. 

Pointed. 

And stared. 

And gave me that ''seriously you're eating that'' face and then said ''That's about the worst thing you could eat for your baby.'' What's a person supposed to respond to that comment? 

A. I don't work super close with you so why are you pointing fingers at me?
B. I just moved into a house and my kitchen currently looks like this: 

 

C. I BROUGHT SOME STRAWBERRIES TO GO WITH IT OK?
D. Being pregnant is HHARRRRRD <---- Insert whine here 

Please don't fault me if on my way out the door I thought, "Oh i'll just grab these ramen noodles for lunch instead of going to Wendy's for the umpteenth time while we've been kitchen-less the past 3 months."


So guess what? THIS IS WHAT I HAD FOR BREAKFAST THIS MORNING. SO THERE. I feel good about it. Baby feels good about it. WE'RE ALL HAPPY. Sodium and Sugar. My two favorite things. 

Wednesday, May 2, 2012

Odd or Even.

I'm pretty certain this conversation happened in the car the other day between John and I:

(Head's up, no judging allowed!)


Driving down State Street trying to find a paint store...

John: Try to catch a number on one of those buildings.

Me: We're still like 3 blocks away. We're fine.

John: I know but catch a number for me will ya?

Me: Why?

John: Because! Then I know what side of the street the store is located!

Me: (Confused/pondering face) Whhhatt?? You can tell which side of the street the store is on just by looking at a number 3 blocks away???

John: (Looking at me incredulously like i'm some kind of scientific experiment that he happened to be lucky enough to marry)   Are you serious?   (Now a laugh bubbles up and out and explodes as he throws his head back)   Sarah!! How long have you lived in Utah? Odd number addresses are on one side and even's are on the other! So if you snag a number for me then I know what side of the street the store is located! 

At about this point he adds in his famous ''I love you'' Which translates into: ''Bless your dumb little heart. You make me laugh alllllll the time.''

Instead of being ticked this just made me get a big smile and realize how much easier my future address-finding is going to be! Hooray. Here's to Utah city planning!